if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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