Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
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It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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