he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
COCAINE IS GR8
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
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