so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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