You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize