Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
My breath smells like gin and sadness
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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