Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
