do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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