I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
