people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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