i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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