My nipple is on Facebook.
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
