Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
