Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
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