i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
