He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
These 23 People Share the Worst Advice They’ve Been Given
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets