Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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