I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
