I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool