I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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