I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
