erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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