Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Randomize
