Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
