come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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