I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Randomize
