Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize