MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
