eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
P.S. I can't hear my feet
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
