How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
its liver damage thursday
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
