i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize
