Tell her she can't have a vagina
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize