theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
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