so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
