Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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