I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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