I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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