i would punch a child for taco bell
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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