I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
