your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Randomize
