so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Randomize
