remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize