Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
