Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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