Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Randomize