I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Randomize
