Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
