please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
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