Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
