she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
